Home is wherever you are...

Home Is Where The Heart Is

Last Tuesday we had a seminary at school. The whole point was to learn how to use the focus group interview technique, but somehow I went away thinking about the topic.

We were supposed to write about a time when we felt  “at home” (obviously in some place other than our own houses…) It was a hard task for me to accomplish but I managed to come up to a page. I will not tell you what I wrote because we were supposed to remain anonym and I don’t want to spoil the whole purpose of the study. Also because it wasn’t a story of the highest quality and I am less than satisfied with what I could come up to…

Anyway, what I wrote is not what made me think, but the results of the whole research. We gathered in groups and analyzed a bunch of other people’s stories. All of them where different, completely different experiences and just by reading them fast, they all told different things. The amazing thing came when we started to look for things that would characterize the feeling of “being home”.

All 20 something stories said the same:  one feels at home when they feel secure, protected, when the feel loved, when they are allowed to be themselves, when they are accepted and when they feel that they can retain their agency.

During the focus group interview one very smart classmate said that the feeling of security comes from within, from being comfortable with the person we are, with our choices, beliefs, values, virtues and weaknesses. She said that usually, when we lack self security we tend to rely on someone else. Like small children rely on their parents to build up a sense of belonging, of security and a sense of “self”.

I thought a lot about that, I couldn’t stop thinking that we can feel home anywhere in the world, as long as we have people around us who help us become better, who cheer us up, who are there to strengthen us when our weaknesses take over and make us believe that that's all we are, nothing but a bunch of defects…

I am so thankful that I have that kind of people all around me, my sisters, my dad, my aunts and cousins, my friends, my dearest and closest friends!, my wonderful niece and nephew, my adorable, wonderful and amazing daughters, my “gubbe” (whose job is more like showing me when I am letting myself go and when I get overwhelmed by adversities or problems)… I have my beliefs, too, my values, my experiences and my memories…

As long as I can keep all of that, I am sure that I will always be home, because “Home is where the heart is”

An unusual day ahead?

Emily

Olivia

Yesterday I cleaned the house, did the washing up, made Fader's day's cake (today it's father's day in Sweden) and convinced myself that today it was going to be a relaxing day... WRONG! at least so far...
Yesterday after dinner the girls went to their playroom and played long and nicely, not one fight!! (there was something in the air) so I woke upp to a battle field that needs to be cleared up today... A while after the girls woke up and of course, one of the beds was wet and everything has to be washed... no point saying that I changed the sheets yesterday... and more to come... since the playroom is not for being used the girls keep coming with toys to the livingroom... we'll see what's next...
So far: family activity: clean the playroom!!!
But... honestly, aren't they adorable!!

It's been so long!

It's crazy that I haven't written for so long... I am not quite sure a lot has happened but it seems like a bunch to me.
A few months ago we found out that Olivia was allergic to dog hair and Indi had to find a new home. That was not at all easy and I miss him more than I thought I would, specially our walks in the mornings, when I was completely fed up with studying. Now I am embarrassed that I haven post a picture of him, better late than never... The good part is that he got a very nice home with a great family who love him and take really good care of him.
My sister Cecilia was here, sadly not long enough; on top of that I had the busiest time in school. We had some good time and it was really good to be able to talk long. I miss the times when we would get in the car and drive somewhere just to talk about all and nothing...
Then my dad came. Only for a week though... When I saw him laughing with the girls and playing hide and seek with them I got the warmest feeling in my heart. I understood what life is all about, or maybe I shouldn’t be so dramatic, but I understood what a great blessing it really is to be able to be the mom to my wonderful girls. I felt in my heart that as much as I love school and as much as I wish to become a nurse and be the best one that I could possibly be, nothing in this world compares to the joy of being the mom that I am... even when I wish I was better and every day I try to get better... It finally made sense: “No Other Success Can Compensate for Failure in the Home” I miss my dad, we had great times, we talked like never before and the memories of my mom felt our hearts with joy and gratitude to have been able to be with her and be such an important part in her life.
And then guess what! I became an aunty again!!! I am so extremely proud and happy for the niece and nephew that I have! Sebastian is so beautiful, he is one cute little gentleman! Seeing him reminded me of the miracle of life, how amazing it is to receive a new human being into this world, so pure, so innocent! I even thought about getting one more myself... though I am starting to seriously doubt about it... and I mean SERIOUSLY! (So don't post comments trying to encourage me!)
My dad and I went to meet him in England... it was great to be all together, I didn't have

Aunt Ceci and my girls having ice cream in Smygehamn

My beautiful niece Marina and nephew Sebastian

all the days I would have liked and missed the girls, but I had so much fun! And yes, I was stupid enough to forget my camera! Not one single picture... so you will have to trust my memories...
Now life has come back to the routine, school, housework and that's pretty much it. School is going fine, pretty busy but I am determined not to get stressed.
Latest news is that Emily was very worried, she wanted pets but didn't really know what animals we were allergic to, so a few days ago she finally got the courage to ask "mom, are we allergic to fish?" I couldn't laugh because she was being very serious and respectful "no sweetie, we aren't", "then we can have a fish tank!!" and so it happened that two days later daddy got her a fish tank and a few guppies... Life is good!

Loved Indi... you are missed

Olivia's 3rd B-day!!

Here are some pics av Olivia's birthday... first home with a fairy cake, then at the play house with her friends from kinder...

trip to Ringsjöstrand

Marveled!

"Look mom! I'm a sloth!!!"

I think I can, I think I can... but I'm scared to death...

My two little mermaids (both called Ariel, obviously)

I am tired of wainting for the marshmallows!

I am almost sure that the whole idea of the GPS came when a very unfortutate drive decided to drive somewhere in the middle of Sweden. I cannot believe that anyone could get the signs so confusing!!! So thank you, whoever you are, for inventing the wonerful GPS and thanks to you who came up with the idea of putting it in a mobile phone!! Brilliant!
Since Nick was going to pick up some pipes for the fireplace somewhere up in Skåne, he came up with the idea of turning it into a family trip to Ringsjö.
In the way we found out that Olivia gets sick in long car trips... not the best way to find out about it but one of the only ones I'm affraid... But mom was very well prepared so she didn't panic and changed the outfit, washed the car sit and sprayed som air freshener.
It was a very lovely day I have to say... I just can't get enough of seeing the girls enjoying themselves and having a good time. They jumped into the lake, climbed and jump in the playgrounds and we barbacued sausages and marshmallows (that should be another post because believe it or not we drove around like crazy just to find a place where barbacueing was allowed and ended up turning the tiny little thing in the middle of a national park...we had to play stupid and ignore the signs since the girls were about to have an hypoglycemic coma) 
Anyway... best day of the year so far... here are some pics... I have one on a curled up sausage but it is far too embarrassing to post it... 

James Martin's profiteroles

Ne-e, NEVER accuse a profiterole of being out of fashion! These things are heavenly!!!
After a very lovely lunch with friends and a whole lot of talking about food I got a craving for profiteroles with custard and dulce de leche; and since I had already whisked for two hours for making dulce de leche I figured it wouldn't hurt to try to make these...

The recipe comes at the end, in case you wanna try them. And I will have to say "thank you, James Martin for the recipe!".

For the choux pastry

• 200ml/7fl oz cold water
• 4 tsp caster sugar
• 85g/3oz unsalted butter, plus extra for greasing
• 115g/4oz plain flour
• pinch salt
• 3 medium free-range eggs, beaten
  
  

  Preparation method

• Preheat the oven to 200C/400F/Gas 6. Place a small roasting tin in the bottom of the oven to heat.
  
• For the choux pastry, place the water, sugar and butter into a large saucepan. Heat gently until the butter has melted.
  
• Turn up the heat, then quickly pour in the flour and salt all in one go.
  
• Remove from the heat and beat the mixture vigorously until a smooth paste is formed. Once the mixture comes away from the side of the pan, transfer to a large bowl and leave to cool for 10-15 minutes.
• Beat in the eggs, a little at a time, until the mixture is smooth and glossy and has a soft dropping consistency - you may not need it all.
  
• Lightly grease a large baking sheet. Using a piping bag and plain 1cm/½in nozzle, pipe the mixture into small balls in lines across the baking sheet. Gently rub the top of each ball with a wet finger - this helps to make a crisper top.